Monday, January 2, 2012

2011 Part One: Things That Can Kiss My Ass


This post was to publish on New Year’s Eve and I just plain forgot as I was busy throwing out my hip. 
As what has been a truly horrible year for my family ends I’d like to share two posts with you.  The first one will be entitled, “Things That Can Kiss My Ass” the second one, “Things That Lifted Me Out of Darkness (Even If Only Momentarily).” I thought I’d finish with the good in some sort of effort to fool karma or whatever force it is that has been fucking with my family all year.

Part One:Things That Can Kiss My Ass
Death
Uterine cancer
COPD
“End-stage” anything
Mortgage companies
Soccer Ball sized cysts and fibroids

The Republican Party in general
Arch Bay Holdings, LLC
My flat fucking feet
My back, neck and all bones attached to either
Over draft fees
AT&T for keeping me on hold for 40 minutes while deciding weather to give back my dead mom’s money
All doctors at Suburban Lung except the lovely, hopeful and empathetic Dr. Tim McGee (my mom would want me to tell you he looks just like Rahm Emanuel)
MDS (the blood disorder, and while we’re at in; throw in muscular dystrophy, that sucks too)
Alcoholism
Clinical Depression
AD/HD
Food poisoning
Packing up your life
Moving your garden in the late Autumn
Writing thank you notes that you can’t send for your mom’s memorial because it's too final
Anything that causes any of my children to be heartbroken, except bedtime; that one is ridiculous

KISS MY ASS, 2011, DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU IN THE ASS!




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